While El Fez has been spotted around the many pubs of Glasgow, it has recently come to light from Sir Elof that the only visit Elvis ever made to the U.K. was in Ayrshire, Scotland
MOONCAT:
LOOK! THE KING WAS IN PRESTWICK AIRPORT-WHY ISN'T THERE AN ELVIS FILM
ABOUT BEING IN AYRSHIRE, WHAT'S HONALULU GOT THAT DAILY HUSNAE
ABIDABIDOO:
Unfortunately for the KING he didn't make it outside the airport. I feel
sure he'd have loved Ayrshire like a child of his very own. He did leave
one thing behind though, the GRACELAND cafe situated in the airport
departure lounge
MOONCAT:
More like DISGRACELAND, anyhoo maybe this is more your thang
ABIDABIDOO:
Rumour has it he partook of a Killy Pie which sparked off his love of fatty
foods and his bizarre dietary habits which ended in his untimely demise.
Lucky for all King lovers he didn't make it through Kirkoswald as one visit
to the world renowned Greasy Pie could have spelled the end much quicker
KT:
Somehow "Viva Las Cumnock" and "Blue Drongan" just don't have the same kind of
world wide appeal. It is also a little known fact that the King actually did
visit Girvan on his flying stopover in Scotland, jumping into the Star Wars
bar at the Hammy fur a quick pint, that was the last time it was decorated
in memory of the KING Himself being there! The King immortalises the bar
which inspires him to write "In the Ghetto"
MOONCAT:
IT'S TRUE! THEN HE WENT INTAE COLVINS FUR A NEW SUIT
KT:
Aye, the wee wumen that worked in there goat such a shock at the sight of
the King Himself in the changing rooms all her hair fell out, resulting in
that legendary wig we all came to love and cherish!
MOONCAT:
I WONDER IF HE WAS THERE ON A WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON AND IF HE WENT INTO
WOOLIES?
SIR ELOF:
He went into Flix, Girvan, was petrified and is now a statue on one of the pool
tables?
MOONCAT:
At least he didn't make it to Molesters!
ABIDABIDOO:
Elof, you get special points for observation and memory considering the
state we were all in when we made it to Flix on that joyous day. Well done,
bravo
MOONCAT:
That's cos he drinks like a poof!
SPARKY:
I seem to recall from me chipshop days in The Derby chippy
a big guy in white suit with chip stains. he always said:
Helloo little paper boy"
Salt and vinegar sir ?
"Ahhauhah. Yeah."
MOONCAT:
...and we all know his real name was Elvis Aaeronport Prestwick (and you know what that would be in the phonebook!)
THE BARON:
Yeahee yeah
SLOAN:
How can you prove that Elvis came to Girvan anyways? He looks just like
everyone I've seen in The Swee: white boiler suits, sideburns and a stomach
the size of the millennium dome
PS. If there is an Elvis list, how come we don't have a Jimmy Hoffa list?
Just a thought...
GAV:
Didn't Elvis drive a taxi in Girvan? Me and my friends used to shout 'Hey
Elvis!' at him and he used to tell us to piss off. So it must have been him trying to keep his identity secret.
MOONCAT:
Yeah he now does Karaoke at the Vic - Angie (the missus) loves him!
